By Maddie Monroe
When someone enters hospice care, their life is not defined solely by their illness. They are still a parent, a friend, a storyteller, a card player, a crafter and, in Charles’ case, a crocheter.
For Harbor Hospice volunteer Nancy, one of her most meaningful experiences began when she decided to learn something new: how to crochet alongside a patient.
Nancy began volunteering with Harbor Hospice shortly after moving to Muskegon. A retired nurse who previously owned an elder care business in Denver, she came to hospice volunteering with a simple philosophy: even when life becomes terminal, every day should be as meaningful and comfortable as possible.
“As a volunteer, I get to let that person direct the experience they want and need,” Nancy said.
In Charles case, that meant crocheting.
Charles had found peace and relaxation in crocheting during a difficult period of his life. When Nancy learned how meaningful the activity was to him, she wanted to help him reconnect with something that had once brought him comfort.
“If crocheting brought him peace in the inconceivably difficult times, it gave me the gift of trying to get that back,” Nancy said. “And we can share some mutual frustration along the way. Makes us laugh!”
Learning to crochet alongside Charles became more than simply learning a new craft. It became a way for Nancy to meet him where he was to spend time together, share conversation and laughter, and give him an opportunity to focus on something other than his illness.
“He has so much determination!” Nancy said. “He has indicated that some of the process is simply the company but remembers the peace and relaxation he found crocheting while incarcerated.”
That kind of companionship is at the heart of hospice volunteering. Volunteers don’t need to have all the answers or possess a particular skill set. Sometimes, they simply need to be willing to listen, learn and follow a patient’s lead.
“It’s important to remember that being in hospice doesn’t mean patients stop enjoying the things they love,” said Amber Wallace, Harbor Hospice Volunteer and Events Coordinator. “Whether it’s playing cards, coloring, crafting, or crocheting, meaningful companionship looks different for everyone.”
Charles wanted to continue crocheting, and Nancy’s willingness to learn allowed him to continue an activity that brought him joy and a sense of normalcy.
For Nancy, hospice volunteering is about creating space for those moments.
“Hospice volunteering in general for me allows the person I’m with to maybe have some time to step away from their illness and talk about past life experiences, which is really all we have,” she said. “When you are there to engage and ask questions about their life that you obviously do not know, I guess they can brag, or relive or release…whatever the moment allows. Hopefully, that brings comfort at their end.”
Nancy says Charles is a forthright person who has lived a complicated life and experienced significant loss. Through their time together, she has seen his gratitude for the Harbor Hospice community.
“He is so grateful for all of his Harbor Hospice community,” she said.
For Amber, Nancy’s willingness to learn crocheting is one example of the way Harbor Hospice volunteers go above and beyond for patients. Across the organization, volunteers continually find creative ways to connect with patients based on their individual interests, abilities and needs.
“Our volunteers are incredibly thoughtful and adaptable in the way they care for patients,” Amber said. “Our volunteers truly meet patients where they are, and they’re always willing to learn and find creative ways to support each individual’s needs.”
Whether that means learning to crochet, finding a way for a patient to hold their cards during a game, or creating a picture and word chart to communicate with a nonverbal patient, the goal remains the same: connection.
“To me, volunteers who go above and beyond are showing our patients that they truly matter,” Amber said. “They help patients feel seen, heard, and valued as individuals, not just for their care needs.”
Nancy and Charles’ crochet sessions are a beautiful reminder that some of the most meaningful moments in hospice care can be simple ones. A ball of yarn, a crochet hook, a willingness to learn and a little shared frustration can become an opportunity for laughter, conversation and comfort.
And sometimes, the greatest gift a volunteer can give is the willingness to sit down, pick up a new skill and share the moment together.